six cubic metres of letting go and the chair that made me weep.

.

This is the chair that made me weep. I began last Thursday when a friend of mine finally called me back and we agreed to meet on the weekend for coffee and a catch up after more than a year. This sent me into an instant state of dread. Oh my god my car port is a mess what if she drives down the driveway and sees all the stuff there the not so secret shame of my inner turmoil made visible. I had my computer open and I googled big skip bins and ordered one for the next day. So early Saturday morning I got everyone in the house out of bed and we attacked the car port, the patio and the front verandah. Gathering up broken bits of furniture, great finds (courtesy of Tim) that turned out to be not so great- one day he bought home a windshield he found on the side of the road!!!! (No it didn't fit anyones car. No I don't know why.) Oh there was also the bin full of rubbish- Tim forgot to put the bin out for our collection day. We were motoring along when I came to this pink chair. It had belonged to my great grandmother. I was given it when I moved into my first home when I was pregnant with Bantam Boy. It sat in the nursery that I had spent hours sewing curtains and cot sheets and making mobiles. I can see it sitting beside the window. I fed my first little baby in that chair by the window. It followed me to Kalgoorlie where I rocked Bantam Boy to sleep while I was pregnant with Chicky Babe. It was one of a couple of things I fought for when I left and took nothing with me but the kids and a few bags of clothing and was not allowed to take when the stuff was shipped back. It was one of three bits of furniture that I had in my first home I had with my children when I first became the 'little red hen' doing it on my own. 

But the poor old chair has seen some hard times. When Bantam Boy was only about 4 Nana (my Nana) came to visit and he threw himself at he in a vigorous show of affection. A cuddle that was more like some kind of rugby tackle! Luckily this old chair broke her fall but in the process of saving her from any serious injury the chair's leg was broken, it was patched and mended but not properly and a few years ago it collapsed well rather took on a very serious lean, I put it out on the front verandah, moved it to the patio thought about throwing it away or the possibility of mending it properly and wondered if it would be too expensive for an old chair that is not particularly special.

So when I got to this chair in the big clear out this weekend, I faltered, I rang my mum.

"Just chuck it!" she said.

Ok I thought I can throw it away but when I went to pick it up to take it out the front to the bin the tears came. Bantam Boy and Tim were a little perplexed. I tried to explain through my tears why I couldn't do it. They both laughed at me lovingly and gave me big hugs. BB has been proud of my attempts to let go of some of the things that I have been hanging on to and is supportive of my efforts to get things sorted. He finds it particularly interesting as he is doing psychology, I'm a great case study full of interesting quirks for him to observe and try to understand.

We have kept the chair and I'm going to find out how much it will cost to have it repaired properly.

This ENORMOUS box of chocolates was a present from Tim because he didn't like to see me cry.

Luckily I have lots of people to help me polish them off!

 

And this little fellow was sitting in a pot plant at a garage sale where I bought a truck load of the most beautiful pot plants for $50.

My holiday plans are all falling into place and sometimes I am so excited that I can hardly breathe!